Dating and Online Dating Tips
Enjoy the variety of dating and relationship building
tips that follow. They are listed in no particular order.
Show Off – If you have a great
body you’re trying to show off and young physical appearance,
yet worry because you still seem to have difficulty finding dates and
establishing relationships, here are some pointers.
Turn off the “ME” focus. Others tend to
see that as boorish and think you only care about yourself, not others
and certainly not them. Instead, turn the focus on outside interests
that the other person can relate to, even if it has to be the weather.
For help, tune in to an online news source like CNN or subscribe to
a national or other major newspaper or magazine like Newsweek or head
to the public library for the latest news briefs.
Online dating might be a good outlet for you, to as
it generally offers a place to list all your great physical qualities
as well as outside interests and more, presenting a more rounded dating
candidate. Then those who are VERY interested in great abs, youthful
appeal, etc. will be able to check you out. And those who are interested
in the other interests can focus on those, too.
Sit, Don’t Take a Stand –
Instead of voicing your opinions over issues that you pretty well know
cause heated arguments, don’t take a stand. Just sit them out.
There’s no shame in passing up an argument.
For example, if you both call yourselves “Christians,”
yet one of you firmly has a complete set of rules and regulations about
what a “Christian” really is, and doesn’t hesitate
to voice this, skip over conversations about religion.
If you have to, simply say something along the lines
of, “This gets us too heated, so let’s pass on if for now
and move on to something else.” Agree that it’s okay to
disagree. Because it is!
Traditions – Keep up with some
old traditions from each family. Alter some; create new ones. The main
thing here is to make positive memories that you can share and relive
over and over, especially during rough spots when you can’t remember
why you are together. Traditions can be like glue and bind you with
a common past.
Sex VS Love – Sex and love are
not the same thing. Learn the difference and don’t measure love
by your hormones.
Negotiator – Forget “his” and “hers”
roles and who “should” do what when…Learn to negotiate.
What works one day may not work another when timing is off, kids are
on the run and disaster strikes, for instance, when your mother-in-law
drops by unexpectedly.
Love and Hate – Love your mate.
It is OK to strongly dislike (or “maybe” hate) a behavior,
like cracking knuckles or biting nails. But remember to love the person.
Online (and Classified Ad) Dating
The Internet is still pretty safe overall, even for
seniors, according to research of various Internet safety sites like
WiredSafety.org who estimated a 90 – 97 percent “terrific”
Internet. People are chatting with one another, making cyber-dates.
However, there are some general rules of Internet etiquette
or “netiquette” and some precautions to take for possible
dangers lurking there. Here are some pointers compiled from several
websites experienced in cyber-dating techniques and most tips work for
those who reply to classified ads, too.
SAFETY TIPS
1. Do Not Give Out Personal Information -
Whether it’s via email, online chat rooms, message boards, in
your personal ad, etc., do not disclose your personal information like
your complete name, address, telephone number, work place, etc. And
use a third party email address instead of one with your domain or work
domain, too, that is easily traceable.
For example, instead of using joe@seniortimes.com ,
set up an email account like joe@yahoo.com or joe@hotmail.com (search
“free email accounts for places like this). Preferred dating sites
offer email forwarding so that members do not see private information
like this. So if you are on one that differs or makes you uncomfortable,
move along and click elsewhere.
2. Do Not Lie - Be up front about your
age and appearance. Better to not be caught in lies later on or lead
someone on falsely.
3. Be Tactful and Leary - Do not believe
everything you read in posts, in emails: in general online. You could
be chatting with a child or someone faking their sexual orientation.
The odds are that you will probably encounter someone a tad “undesirable”
from time to time, so try to use appropriate replies, using tact, or
ignore the encounter, if it suits the situation.
4. Use Caution in Sharing Images -
Whenever you think about sharing a digital photo online, keep in mind
that it may be possible for thousands to see it on the Internet, not
just one person. Plus your photo can be copied, altered with different
software out there today and posted elsewhere. If you do use your image,
send one that shows you with a warm smile, not a frown.
5. Ask if Unsure - Go slow like the
tortoise in the race with the hare and ask questions if you are unsure
how to proceed in your contact and communications. Contact the site
owner or webmaster (check for contact info when you register), ask trusted
friends for helpful resources, check with local authorities. Remember
that old adage, “Better safe than sorry!”
6. Be careful if you decide to meet for the
first date. Remember there is safety in numbers, so meet in
a public place with other friends around.
7. Keep copies of communications in a file so
that you can show friends or the law in case your meeting or continued
contact takes a bad turn. And do report any problems and cooperate with
authorities. They can get information from your computer and communications
to aid in tracking down culprits in some cases. Don’t try to take
matters into your own hands and stalk the culprit yourself, though.
Be safe.
8. Let men instigate online and offline relationships.
Men still like to pursue. Online studies show that this has proven safer,
too, with Internet dating. Men should make the first email move. And
women should NOT reply to men’s ads; let the men pursue. (Sorry
guys!)
9. So that you don’t appear anxious or
desperate or both, generally wait for a day or 24-hour period before
replying. And forget about replying on weekend and holidays,
at least at first, and being available via instant messaging. This is
especially important for women (double standards are still around and
even exist in the Internet dating scene) – you want to “appear”
socially active, confident – blah, blah, blah, even if you are
just home washing your hair.
10. Don’t date someone who is already
married to someone else – even if that person says he
or she is getting a divorce. Let the divorce happen first. Otherwise
things could get ugly. And you may even have to face the spouse / ex-spouse
and children down the road. So think of others, too, when even considering
someone who is not single.
11. If after several emails or letters you decide
to talk on the phone, keep the first call short, around 10 minutes.
Plan to have to “rush” off. Your goal is to hear
the person’s voice and talk a short while only, not seeming over
anxious.
12. Some gents do complain that the ladies do
not reply. So ladies, reply! At least say, “No, thank
you.”
NETIQUETTE
Here are some general guidelines to refer to in your
online communications.
· Use respectful tones and wording. Swear words
and hurtful remarks are not good for anyone. If someone presses you,
for example, to share confidential information that you shouldn’t,
just say, “No” and tell the site monitors / webmaster of
the forum, chat room or online dating site, if necessary.
· Look for dating and other resource websites
that list street addresses instead of post office boxes or nothing at
all. Ask friends for referrals.
· Try to avoid stretching the truth about your
accomplishments, job title, etc. Then if a relationship develops, things
will run much smoother.
· Try to avoid many 1-word replies and 1-sentence
communications. Take some time to develop your thoughts and share in
your paragraphs. In short, be a friend.
· All capital letters mean “shouting”
and is difficult to read at any length.
Take care and have fun with your cyber-dating
Dating and Attraction
How
To Attract The Mate Of Your Dreams
How
To Start A Conversation With An Attractive Stranger
Sexual Strategies
Evolved Dating
Finding Fun Date Ideas
Forbidden
First Date Discussions
Are You Dating
a Potential Cheater?
Dating
Date Lying
Online Dating Tips
The
Many Benefits of an Online Dating Service
Why Online Dating
Services Beat Traditional Personals Every Time
Why You MUST Have
a Photo in Your Internet Personals Ad
Free Dating Sites vs.
Paid Dating Sites
