Why are so many people stuck in a Sexless Marriage?
Why do so many people want sex help?
Information Update
From Dr. Andrew D. Atwood, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
www.HopefulSolutions.net
This material is presented for educational and informational
purposes only. No other claims are made. Always consult your health
care professional for specific personal care recommendations.
Why do so many people want sex help?
Reason No. 1.
There simple are A LOT OF PEOPLE who want sex help. The research has
indicated that as many as 17 million people in the United States alone
are in a relationship where they have sex 10 times a year or less.
That is A LOT OF PEOPLE who might well want sex help.
Reason No. 2.
Sexual desire is a very basic human need; it is integral to the perpetuation
of our species. There aren’t nearly as many people who want
help to pick out the right color of socks; the right color socks isn’t
fundamental to the perpetuation of our species.
Reason No. 3.
A healthy sexual relationship is very important to a healthy marriage.
That isn’t to say that a healthy marriage must necessarily have
healthy sex, but it is very important. People who want sex help are
very often asking for help with something that is right at the center
of their relationship.
Reason No. 4.
There is no more common arena for working through control issues than
the arena of sex. A search for sex help is often a cloaked way of
searching for a solution to the control dramas that exist between
a man and a woman. The more mature a relationship, the less often
there are control dramas, and the less often there are struggles for
sex help.
Reason No. 5.
We live in an age when most people expect to have a satisfying sexual
relationship. It is a combination of factors that have created these
shared expectations. The media has contributed, as has the changing
status of women around the world. Everyone believes that they deserve
to enjoy a life where they don’t need sex help.
Reason No. 6.
Shame and guilt about sex are disappearing quickly. For some centuries,
we “civilized humans” were encouraged to get our sexual
desires under control; there was little room for impulsiveness. Today,
we believe sex is normal, sexual desire is natural, and sexual expression
is fun and playful. Our paradigm has shifted. If shame and guilt still
hang around the area of sexuality, then we want sex help so we can
free ourselves.
Reason No. 7.
We simply live in an age where we don’t have to put up with
stuff that doesn’t work right. If your body is troubled, you
go to the Doc and get a fix. If your money isn’t growing fast
enough for you, you go to an Investment Counselor and get the ball
rolling. If your computer isn’t working, you find a Technician
to work some wonders. The point is, we have grown accustomed to finding
a fix for most problems in life. Sex help makes perfect sense in a
world where there is help for almost anything!
Reason No. 8
Men and women don’t know how to please each other very well
at all. There simply has been too much focus on intercourse as a way
of reaching mutual pleasure. It takes more than 20 minutes, on average,
for a woman to become aroused to the point of orgasm. 75% of men don’t
take 2 minutes, and not enough men and women have worked at mastering
“The Art of a 25-Minute Arousal.”
Dr. Atwood
Hopeful Solutions for Your Sexless Marriage is the
BIG, 137 page eBook written by Dr. Atwood. The companion volume is
You
Can Save Your Marriage. You can find both, and more, at www.HopefulSolutions.net.
Dr. Andrew D. Atwood, LMFT. 534 Fountain St. NE, Grand Rapids, MI
49503 - Voice 616.456.1178 - Email DrAtwood@HopefulSolutions.net.
©2002-2004 Save Your Marriage, PLC. All rights reserved.
Disclaimer: The material presented on these pages
if for your information only. It is not a substitute for professional
medical advice. It may not represent your true individual medical
situation. Do not use this information to diagnose or treat a health
problem or disease without consulting a qualified health care provider
in person. Please consult your health care provider in person if you
have any questions or concerns. Always use common sense and research
your own personal situation thoroughly.
